Holiday Shopping

With the holidays coming, we're already feeling the pressure of spending more money then we have.  It's crazy that before Halloween is even over, people start talking about what & how they are going to spend for the holidays.  Our family celebrates Christmas and most people are celebrating some holiday around this time and it's all revolved around how much to spend.  I'm currently struggling with this because we have so many relatives to shop for.  Its one of the blessings & curses of coming from a large family of 8 kids, as well as marrying someone who comes from a family of 5 kids....lots of siblings, in-laws, nieces and nephews.  That doesn't even count the aunts, uncles, family friends and other removed relatives that are involved. 

There is so much pressure to do for others what you receive, but if you're trying to get your financial life back on track, this is the worst time of the year.  I hear people say all the time that you should reciprocate the amount or worth of what you were given.  However, it's not that I don't want to, but many people we receive gifts from are in higher income bracket then my family, especially with our current struggles with debt. 

We have 20+ parties a year just in birthdays alone that need to be accounted for (not including friends parties we are invited to which will grow as the kids are older), but doing all of this at one time for Christmas is just too overwhelming.  This year, I was planning on using the points my husband has earned on his business credit card (because we aren't in a position yet to pay it off) and buy as many presents with that that we could.  I'm sure that we will inevitably put money out of our pockets still but these points can give us a majority of our presents for the kids & some extended family this year. 

However, my husband mentioned his family wants to do a Pollyanna for the kids and spend more money per person then I was hoping to spend on the entire holiday.  Since we have 3 kids, we would need to spend for 3 kids in return in order for all the kids to be covered. I know that my in-laws will think I'm being cheap but the truth is, I wasn't planning on spending that much money on my own children to now be spending that kind of money on someone else's (family or not).  It creates a lot of tension towards me because I don't speak openly about my financial issues because I don't think they're really any one's business.  Also, since my goal is to get out of debt altogether, most people don't agree with my viewpoint.

This is a very stressful issue for me and I will continue to keep you updated on how I am handling it.  Maybe through your support I will be able to stick to my goals and not give in to guilt or temptation of others.  Any suggestions are WELCOME!  Talk to you soon.